And people have started to question my non-cheerfulness.
"Are you OK? You are very quiet!"
"What happened to the diva?!"
(I diva meh?)
Anyways, I was trying very very hard to avoid eye contact with CG the whole morning. Poor CG! I just don't know what to say to him! I tried squeezing out a smile when our eyes inevitably met after my gazillionth attempt at diverting my sight into the non-existent space behind, above, and around him. It was PATHETIC! Never ever try to squeeze a smile! A smile is not a lemon! It cannot be squeezed! You'll end up with a sour smile more sour than a rotten lemon.
Sin Eng Boleh
Friday, September 17, 2010
Note to Self: Avoid Conversation
I met up with a few friends whom I haven't seen in a while. Not that I'm eager to meet anyone at the moment but some friends came from Penang and they asked a few people out, which included me, and those few friends.
Friend: "So how's work? You are freelancing, right?"
Me: "Ya, I'm freelancing but I do not have any job at the moment. Actually I've been jobless for the past 6 months."
Friend: "Oh... but you have a cafe, right?"
Me: "Ya, but the cafe is not enough to sustain me."
Friend: "..."
Me: "..."
I think it's best to avoid petty conversation, or in this case, any conversation at all costs because I seriously don't know how to react to people not knowing how to react.
Friend: "So how's work? You are freelancing, right?"
Me: "Ya, I'm freelancing but I do not have any job at the moment. Actually I've been jobless for the past 6 months."
Friend: "Oh... but you have a cafe, right?"
Me: "Ya, but the cafe is not enough to sustain me."
Friend: "..."
Me: "..."
I think it's best to avoid petty conversation, or in this case, any conversation at all costs because I seriously don't know how to react to people not knowing how to react.
Sunday, August 29, 2010
And Then I Found Myself
While I was looking for my old toys in Penang, I came across this photo (K modified it, of course).
Wednesday, July 28, 2010
Toys: Mathly In Love
Another day, another parcel! (Help! I can't stop!)
OK the story with this one is, my mum thought I no longer play with it so she sold it to my aunt! Recently I asked my mum to check with my aunt if she still has it – she can't remember ever buying such a thing from my mum!
But it's OK, now it's back! :D
Like the name suggests, it's mainly an educational toy for learning maths. But it also has a Who Loves Who? Game (yes kids started young those days) where you key in birth dates of yourself and the person you have the hots for and see if you are a match made in heaven. Lovely.
Saturday, July 24, 2010
Toys: Evil Olive's Vile Tokens of Love
The most expensive item I purchased from eBay so far. Originally I wanted to see how far people will go for this item and it turned out I was the one going furthest!
Anyways this is not what I had during my childhood but it's still fun to play with: Olive Oyl has loaded an entire humanity's supply of bottled drinks, pineapple and canned spinach in the trunk of her car and she's trying to sink Popeye's puny boat by throwing these items at him. Popeye's best friend Brutus is trying to knock some sense into him.
Made in 1981, this tit tit game has some minor scratches here and there but the sound, graphic and control are all in very good condition. It turns 30 next year.
Thursday, July 22, 2010
Post Inception Syndrome (PISsed)
I knew I was in a dream and I was receiving this mysterious black envelope when I heard the music (in the movie the music is played through headphones by an accomplice to the dreamer so he knows that the kick [the sudden feeling of falling] that would wake the dreamer up is coming). But it's too soon! I haven't even looked at what's inside the envelope yet! However, unlike the movie, it's not Édith Piaf's "Non, je ne regrette rien", the music sounded quite ethnic... I had to listen more closely (I sleep with ear plugs and my head sandwiched between two pillows).
When I finally figured out the music I was already wide awake (yes never to find out what's inside the black envelope). The music was unmistakeably Indian: there were the signature "Hoy! Hoy!" at certain intervals, hand-clapping as base rhythm and the occasional drumming.
MUUUUTHFUUUUKRS! It was 4.45am. OK maybe they would go away after a few minutes... so I sandwiched my head harder (any harder my head'd become a pâté).
5.05am: I gave up! I went to the window and saw a bunch of 6 to 8 Indians opposite my house doing the full set with dance and it didn't look like they were going to disperse any time soon.
So I did the most sensible thing any pissed dream agent would do when his mission was interrupted: 999. I told the police there's a bunch of merrymakers opposite my house and he understood immediately. I continued to observe them while waiting for the Police to arrive.
The dance moves included floor sweeps, squat and bounce, hands in air (with "hoyhoy"s) and they were using the large rubbish bin as drum.
Detaining journalist for flood photography is one thing but I must say the police are pretty efficient: they arrived in 10 minutes and I could almost see the panic on their faces as the police car approached. A few quickly walked away but the police managed to question 3 of them. And made them picked up the mess they made.
Joy! Most probably should get back to sleep (and maybe find that black envelope...)
*growl growl*
OK some instant noodles first.
When I finally figured out the music I was already wide awake (yes never to find out what's inside the black envelope). The music was unmistakeably Indian: there were the signature "Hoy! Hoy!" at certain intervals, hand-clapping as base rhythm and the occasional drumming.
MUUUUTHFUUUUKRS! It was 4.45am. OK maybe they would go away after a few minutes... so I sandwiched my head harder (any harder my head'd become a pâté).
5.05am: I gave up! I went to the window and saw a bunch of 6 to 8 Indians opposite my house doing the full set with dance and it didn't look like they were going to disperse any time soon.
So I did the most sensible thing any pissed dream agent would do when his mission was interrupted: 999. I told the police there's a bunch of merrymakers opposite my house and he understood immediately. I continued to observe them while waiting for the Police to arrive.
The dance moves included floor sweeps, squat and bounce, hands in air (with "hoyhoy"s) and they were using the large rubbish bin as drum.
Detaining journalist for flood photography is one thing but I must say the police are pretty efficient: they arrived in 10 minutes and I could almost see the panic on their faces as the police car approached. A few quickly walked away but the police managed to question 3 of them. And made them picked up the mess they made.
Joy! Most probably should get back to sleep (and maybe find that black envelope...)
*growl growl*
OK some instant noodles first.
Tuesday, July 20, 2010
Toys: Retro Gaming
My 6th purchase from eBay! This is a game cartridge for NDS which has two classic Nintendo Game & Watch games in it: Parachute (I can't remember going to a friend's/relative's house who didn't have one in the 80s) and Octopus (I didn't have it but definitely played the game before). And it has a hybrid game in it as well: Parachute + Octopus! The rower who fetches the suicidal parachutists also doubles up as diver stealing treasures from the giant octopus! Quite funny actually...
It's not for sale in gaming shops becuase Club Nintendo members can only redeem the game cartidge using the points they accumulated through purchsing other games. But like I said, you can find ANYTHING on eBay.
Sunday, July 18, 2010
Fleeting Moments of Joy
You know how sometimes when you discovered something wonderful and you can't wait to share it with your friends / family / loved ones? Like you just won the lottery? OK not a very good example because some people would actually keep it a secret rather than sharing this kind of joy (and the prize money that comes with it). (And for the record, no, I didn't win any lottery.)
It's the kind of excitement you want to spread around, to the people you know, hoping that they might feel the same as you. But sometimes, they just do not have the time or mood for the things you want to share. It's almost like a scene in a movie where a little child, holding his new toy, ecstatically wanting to play with his parents but they were too busy with the stock market or soap opera so they shooed him away. Disappointed and heart-broken, the kid played alone and cried himself to sleep.
Even if the parents had finally come to their senses and wanting to spend some time with the kid and his new toy, the moment had passed and the child would later became a drug addict / gangster / hobo / etc.
It's the kind of excitement you want to spread around, to the people you know, hoping that they might feel the same as you. But sometimes, they just do not have the time or mood for the things you want to share. It's almost like a scene in a movie where a little child, holding his new toy, ecstatically wanting to play with his parents but they were too busy with the stock market or soap opera so they shooed him away. Disappointed and heart-broken, the kid played alone and cried himself to sleep.
Even if the parents had finally come to their senses and wanting to spend some time with the kid and his new toy, the moment had passed and the child would later became a drug addict / gangster / hobo / etc.
Monday, July 12, 2010
Toys: Tomy AAAAGHH & YEEAGHH!
My 5th shipment arrived today! This time it's from US. It took 18 days to reach here, and the shipping cost a bomb! About 1/3 of the total cost!
Tomy AAAAGHH! (left) is what I used to have as a child (it was the same game with a different name called Tricky Traps). And being a quick-tempered child (and now, a quicker-tempered adult, not that I'm very proud of it), I hit the plastic casing so hard it cracked (didn't shatter) because I couldn't get the balls to their final destination after 2 billion attempts. My bother, thinking it was broken, threw it away (yes he inherited my mum's excellent trait of compulsively trashing other people's childhood memories)! And now I got it back, in perfect working condition, and amazingly new! I'm so very happy!
The one in the middle is called YEEAGHH! and it's like 10 times harder (and louder, there must be a dump truck in there) than AAAAGHH! The goal is the same: to guide the balls up and down through contraptions to reach a spot right in the middle of the game. Unlike AAAAGHH!'s horizontal format, this is a vertical game. I didn't have this as a child but since they are from the same series (you can't tell from the weird sounding names?) and COMBINED SHIPPING (what a vile evil) costs less so I got it. And I'm glad I did. :D (I think there's another one in the series called WOW! but it's very elusive, googling "Tomy WOW!" will only get you to "what happened 'to my WoW' account?" haha. Here's a look.)
The seller also included a little surprise gift for me! (I must have paid a lot more for the above than what they cost! But I say they are well worth it). I haven't popped in a battery yet so I don't know what the game is like. Only comes with left and right buttons so most likely it's a game of dodging or receiving something.
His eBay store: http://stores.ebay.com/momandboysshop
Updates
The handheld on the right is an alien ship crushing game. On top of the screen there's an alien mother ship dispatching little alien ships to Earth. At the bottom of the screen is a rocket attached to a rocket launcher. You move the rocket and launcher left or right to crush the little alien ships as they advance towards Earth.
Sunday, July 11, 2010
Toys: I Almost Mail-Ordered It...
Damn those Japanese! So cute but useless!
Source: http://www.strapya-world.com
Saturday, July 10, 2010
Toys: Epic Packaging
This is my 4th shipment from eBay.
I got it pretty fast, within 5 days of payment. What I wanted to talk about is the PACKAGING:
It's like WAY TOO MUCH! 1. Parcel box; 2. Bubble wrap; 3. Fillers; 4. huge plastic bag containing the two items I bought; 5. Items are individually bubble-wrapped; 6. Before you reach the items, there is tracing paper; 7. One of them is shrink-wrapped!
I got these two pretty cheap and I was the only bidder haha. They are from MASK's Racing Series but they are not vehicles, they are more like props: one is a pit-stop that turns into a catapult;
and the other is a billboard weapon station. Which explains why nobody wants them. But I'm very happy to include them in my collection nonetheless. And they are BRAND NEW. I wonder how these Hong Kongers hide their MASKs so well, and for so long.
I got it pretty fast, within 5 days of payment. What I wanted to talk about is the PACKAGING:
It's like WAY TOO MUCH! 1. Parcel box; 2. Bubble wrap; 3. Fillers; 4. huge plastic bag containing the two items I bought; 5. Items are individually bubble-wrapped; 6. Before you reach the items, there is tracing paper; 7. One of them is shrink-wrapped!
I got these two pretty cheap and I was the only bidder haha. They are from MASK's Racing Series but they are not vehicles, they are more like props: one is a pit-stop that turns into a catapult;
and the other is a billboard weapon station. Which explains why nobody wants them. But I'm very happy to include them in my collection nonetheless. And they are BRAND NEW. I wonder how these Hong Kongers hide their MASKs so well, and for so long.
Friday, July 9, 2010
28 Days to Penang
And to get away from all the nonsense.
Source: http://www.alliefoodtalk.com/2009/01/03/penang-hawker-food-curry-mee-wantan-mee-chulia-street/
Source: http://www.alliefoodtalk.com/2009/01/03/penang-hawker-food-curry-mee-wantan-mee-chulia-street/
Thursday, July 8, 2010
Caramel: Can You Serve?
No, Denise, the answer is a resounding and absolute NO. I don't even want to try anymore. I suck at customer service. If I'm good at it I would have become a customer-sucking whore.
Wednesday, July 7, 2010
Toys: MESS Production
The price we pay for mass production:
Cheap, messy, crappy products. Look at the colouring on the chess pieces: a lot of bleeding and some are not coloured. And the carving work is absolutely horrible. I can't make out what some of the pieces are trying to depict. Found recently in Chinatown for SG$1.25.
This is what I found in Penang a few months ago. Over 20 years old: you can tell from the traditional characters. Colouring and carving are clear and precise. From a game called Air, Land & Sea Battle Chess (海陆空战棋）
Cheap, messy, crappy products. Look at the colouring on the chess pieces: a lot of bleeding and some are not coloured. And the carving work is absolutely horrible. I can't make out what some of the pieces are trying to depict. Found recently in Chinatown for SG$1.25.
This is what I found in Penang a few months ago. Over 20 years old: you can tell from the traditional characters. Colouring and carving are clear and precise. From a game called Air, Land & Sea Battle Chess (海陆空战棋）
Monday, July 5, 2010
Toys: Tit Tit Game
A bit of back story on why I bought the Nintendo Game & Watch Donkey Kong Hockey:
I used to have this white Panorama Series Game & Watch Donkey Kong Jr. Unlike like the shared Octopus and Parachute, I can let others play with it, or not, because it was my reward for getting good grades at school. I had a great time playing with it and kept it nice and clean in its box when its not in use. Eventually I forgot about it as I got into high school, then college and went studying abroad, followed by working in Singapore.
A few years ago I asked my mum about it and she said my younger brother was playing with it after I went studying. When I asked him about it, he said he's broken it and threw it away. *ouch*
A search on eBay didn't get good results on this particular item. But it led me to Donkey Kong Hockey. And it's BRAND NEW! So there you have it.
Just a few days ago I googled "tit tit game" (the sound the game makes) and found this:
The blogger, KS, got his Donkey Kong Jr at the exact same place I got mine! The price label is unmistakably Super Burmah (now defunct Super Departmental Store, Burmah Road, Penang). And he's born in 76!
So I did the only sensible thing a nostalgic sentimentalist would do: I wrote him an email, asking him if he would sell it to me if he's no longer emotionally attached to his game. It was a looong shot.
And he replied two days ago! Guess what? He misplaced all those games after he took the picture for his post in 2008! Dang!
The search for Donkey Kong Jr continues...
Source: http://patheticattempt.blogspot.com/2008/05/game-and-watch.html
I used to have this white Panorama Series Game & Watch Donkey Kong Jr. Unlike like the shared Octopus and Parachute, I can let others play with it, or not, because it was my reward for getting good grades at school. I had a great time playing with it and kept it nice and clean in its box when its not in use. Eventually I forgot about it as I got into high school, then college and went studying abroad, followed by working in Singapore.
A few years ago I asked my mum about it and she said my younger brother was playing with it after I went studying. When I asked him about it, he said he's broken it and threw it away. *ouch*
A search on eBay didn't get good results on this particular item. But it led me to Donkey Kong Hockey. And it's BRAND NEW! So there you have it.
Just a few days ago I googled "tit tit game" (the sound the game makes) and found this:
The blogger, KS, got his Donkey Kong Jr at the exact same place I got mine! The price label is unmistakably Super Burmah (now defunct Super Departmental Store, Burmah Road, Penang). And he's born in 76!
So I did the only sensible thing a nostalgic sentimentalist would do: I wrote him an email, asking him if he would sell it to me if he's no longer emotionally attached to his game. It was a looong shot.
And he replied two days ago! Guess what? He misplaced all those games after he took the picture for his post in 2008! Dang!
The search for Donkey Kong Jr continues...
Source: http://patheticattempt.blogspot.com/2008/05/game-and-watch.html
Toys: Travelling 3300 Miles and 26 Years...
After much disappointment at Funan (see post below), I got an SMS from CK: "It's here."
YAY! I've been expecting my third shipment from eBay since last week! So I headed back to the shop to collect my parcel. Have I mentioned earlier that I LOVE PARCELS? :D
All the way from Chiba Prefecture, Japan.
Apparently in 2008 someone found a few cartons of unopened Nintendo Game & Watch Donkey Kong Hockey in a warehouse (in Japan?) originally headed for Hong Kong. So now you can find them mint in boxes floating around eBay. And cheap (as low as US$50+ at some sites), compared to other mint Game & Watches such as Parachute and Octopus (both US$1000+ to US$2000+).
It's a VS game where you play against another player or the computer. Me and CK got bored after 5 minutes HAHAHAHA...
But it's a nice piece of nostalgia to hold in your hand, especially when it's travelled so far and long to reach you.
YAY! I've been expecting my third shipment from eBay since last week! So I headed back to the shop to collect my parcel. Have I mentioned earlier that I LOVE PARCELS? :D
All the way from Chiba Prefecture, Japan.
Apparently in 2008 someone found a few cartons of unopened Nintendo Game & Watch Donkey Kong Hockey in a warehouse (in Japan?) originally headed for Hong Kong. So now you can find them mint in boxes floating around eBay. And cheap (as low as US$50+ at some sites), compared to other mint Game & Watches such as Parachute and Octopus (both US$1000+ to US$2000+).
It's a VS game where you play against another player or the computer. Me and CK got bored after 5 minutes HAHAHAHA...
But it's a nice piece of nostalgia to hold in your hand, especially when it's travelled so far and long to reach you.
Toys: "Ata.. What?"
So today I went to Funan in search of Atari Flashback 2 (see post below). Not a single person know what I'm talking about, not even the shops selling games. Some frowned at this thing that they don't understand: "A self-contained gaming console with 40 games pre-loaded and just plug and play"? Never heard of. Games come in square or rectangular boxes, or discs only. And even though Nintendo DS did come up with cartridges for old Atari classic games, none of the shops carry them.
If it ain't popular, don't expect to find it in Singapore. Not even in its Premier Digital Mall. They only want to sell popular games so everyone will be playing the same thing. A sales girl asked me to try the toy shop.
*Sigh*
If it ain't popular, don't expect to find it in Singapore. Not even in its Premier Digital Mall. They only want to sell popular games so everyone will be playing the same thing. A sales girl asked me to try the toy shop.
*Sigh*
Toys: Atari Resurrected!
I can so totally live with this! Pre-loaded with 20 classic games and 20 new games, plug and play! Awfully cheap at US$40 but shipping cost as much from Amazon! Need to find out if it's in Singapore already...
Source: www.atari.com
Friday, July 2, 2010
Toys: Very Desirable
This is the first computer system I ever played with, circa 1983. Again, our cousins had the console so we only needed to buy the game cartridges. I remember playing the classic Pac-Man and Space Invaders on this system but what fascinated me the most was a game where you have your pawns (? characters?) on a seesaw and there are 4 to 5 rows of square bits moving from left to right and vice versa at the top of the screen. Your goal is to let one of your pawns bounce off the seesaw, retrieve as many square bits on top as possible and land it back on the seesaw so the other pawn would get bounced off and do the same thing. You'll go to the next level when you finish collecting all the moving bits on top and game over if one of your pawns missed the seesaw and hit the ground.
I don't know if it's one game by itself or comes as part of a family of games. I haven't found out yet becuase according to this list there is a total of 544 games!
Source: http://yonoveotele.wordpress.com/2009/08/23/atari-classics-evolved/
Updates
Found it! It's called Circus Atari.
Thursday, July 1, 2010
Toys: The Danger of Combined Shipping
This is actually the first shipment to arrive. But it is my second purchase from eBay. The first purchase is DYNAMO, but it arrived later than this one.
You'd noticed there are three very colourful action figures at the bottom. Now what I originally wanted was only PIRANHA. But most eBay sellers will always tell you to combine your shipping because just by adding a few dollars more you can get a few more items you don't really want to be shipped together with what you really want.
And that's how I got those Sky Commanders. I don't even know they existed, even though they are produced by the same maker of MASK toys, Kenner. Sky Commanders were not very popular as they lasted only one season according to Internet searches. The toys mainly involve hanging the action figures on strings and let them slide form a higher place to a lower place. Now that I got 3 I have to collect all 6 to make it complete! Yet I can't open up the packaging to play with them because they'd become "loose" items, meaning no longer "carded" (carded being with a backing card) and the value will drop significantly.
So this is what I really wanted. I've never had it back in 86 and neither any of my friends did (as far as I can remember). Maybe because he has this really bad ass look so it wasn't really that likeable. And unlike DYNAMO from the Split Seconds Series, PIRANHA is just a motorcycle with a side car which will transform into a submarine, with only one Sly Rax. Who's gonna drive the other vehicle?
OK why didn't I get VANDAL? That's what I used to have and couldn't find right? Because if I found VANDAL and DYNAMO on my next trip back to Penang then I'd have TWO VANDALs and TWO DYNAMOs! So for the time being I'm very happy with PIRANHA. Am I going crazy? Yes.
Toys: It All Started with A Missing Box of Monopoly
I've never had my own Monopoly board game when I was a child. My cousins had a set and since we all stayed together naturally we didn't need to get another set. We (me, my elder sister and my two elder cousins) had loads of fun acquiring land, building houses, hotels and making each other bankrupt. I especially love those metal pieces representing each player. My favourite pieces were the hat and shoe.
Fast forward to circa 1998 in Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia. I was studying for my art diploma and stayed in a mother-fucking shit hole of a rundown rented flat. The place was so dilapidated I had occasional nightmares about the slime in the bathroom got attached to my feet and started devouring me. However two good things came out of the living hell: I made friends with a bunch of very cool seniors – it was the first time I ever saw a woman parading her bare tits, realised a person will not die instantly no matter how much a person smoked (that person was not me, for the record) and a person can have so much sex until they lost consciousness (again, not me, I merely helped dragged the unconscious back into the room he just had sex in); And the other good thing: I found a box of 1970s Monopoly, almost mint, apart from being yellowed by age.
I checked with everyone in the flat if it was theirs as I found it in one of the many unused cupboards in the living room. I also checked with the landlord and nobody seemed to want it. So I took it back with me to Penang when I finished my study. And in my room it stayed, untouched, for a few years. I would occasionally marvelled at how new and complete the game board and its bank notes were because it's obvious they've only been very gently played with (my cousins' board were almost torn in two and most of the notes were all curled up at the corners from the heavy play).
I started working in Singapore 10 years ago so my room in my grandparents' home has not been occupied since but the door was not locked just in case my visiting aunt needed a room to spend her nights. At this point my cousins and their parents already moved to a new home of their own and so did my parents and siblings. The occupants who were still there were my grandparents, my uncle TB and his son SP.
About 7 years ago, my grandparents' home went under renovation during mid-year. It was a spur of the moment decision by my grandfather after his visited one of his friend's refurbished house. It couldn't wait until I came back to pack my things up. They told me all my stuff would remain in the room while they renovated the place.
By the next Chinese New Year, when I had my spring break, I went back to my grandparent's house to re-organise my room and hopefully able to move some stuff to my parent's current home (which was small and didn't have a room for me but they did have a store room of sort). Guess what? I couldn't find the Monopoly.
I was extremely upset but what could I have done? It could've been the renovator, uncle TB (who has a habit of selling things at Penang's famous Thief's Market for some spare cash) or his son SP. So upset as I was, I told myself it didn't belong to me in the first place, so hopefully now it's gone to some caring hands. I tried to just let it go but the memory of it never really went away.
5 years ago, my parents moved again to another house. The house came with TWO storerooms so it was really great for me to store all my childhood stuff I didn't bring with me to Singapore. When I was going through my stuff, something which I've totally forgotten about after Primary School (1988) caught my eye and fond memories came flooding back:
Source: http://www.toydreams.co.uk/mask/maskboxed.html
There are tonnes of MASK literature online so I'm not going to repeat here. As you can see from the box, DYNAMO is an off road vehicle which will split into 2 – a chopper and an assault cart. It also comes with two action figures, neat. The other one I had was VANDAL, a bulldozer which splits into a plane and a jeep. Also with two action figures. This is a bad guy. I was very happy to have re-found them! BUT...
YES BUT! Just 3 months ago, I had a break in Penang and I was going to bring these two toys back to Singapore. GUESS WHAT? I COULD NOT FIND THEM! I've looked everywhere in both storerooms but I just don't know where they were hiding. Over the years my mum had shifted things around and added other stuff to those storerooms but she assured me she hasn't thrown anything out (when we were younger she threw away a working Polaroid camera citing expensive films, she threw away MANY things...) and I trusted her on this one because I've nagged at her (haha role reversal) over the years not to simply throw away my childhood memories and certain things become valuable with age. (07 Dec 2012 Update: Apparently there is a THIRD storeroom! Mum shifted my MASK toys and some other stuff there!!)
This frustrating incident, my sentimental feelings working overtime coupled with the sad memory of the missing Monopoly opened a flood gate on, you guessed it, eBay! And what a wonderful place it is! One can find anything, SIMPLY ANYTHING! As long as you have the money for it and know when to stop, it is one of the best places on the Internet.
My quest begun with getting back the one I used to have: DYNAMO. And it arrived yesterday! I LOVE parcels!
And I think the two Bruce Satos are very happy to be here!
This is for back-up just in case I really can't find the old one when I go back again to Penang this coming August. I'm gonna move everything out of those storerooms and open every boxes!
Anyways, DYNAMO came in a sealed box with the cardboard insert and the stickers are still not applied yet! It's like buying a new 80s toy! And I think it's been stored in a warehouse that's built underground because the colour on the box are still vividly clear and nice (ad agencies should build a warehouse like this to store their precious precious Pantone charts).
Oh I just noticed my previous entry was dated 17 June 2010, about the same time I started my eBay frenzy (sometimes I bid till 5am), which I had to put a stop to yesterday haha. So yes, more things from eBay to come!
Fast forward to circa 1998 in Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia. I was studying for my art diploma and stayed in a mother-fucking shit hole of a rundown rented flat. The place was so dilapidated I had occasional nightmares about the slime in the bathroom got attached to my feet and started devouring me. However two good things came out of the living hell: I made friends with a bunch of very cool seniors – it was the first time I ever saw a woman parading her bare tits, realised a person will not die instantly no matter how much a person smoked (that person was not me, for the record) and a person can have so much sex until they lost consciousness (again, not me, I merely helped dragged the unconscious back into the room he just had sex in); And the other good thing: I found a box of 1970s Monopoly, almost mint, apart from being yellowed by age.
I checked with everyone in the flat if it was theirs as I found it in one of the many unused cupboards in the living room. I also checked with the landlord and nobody seemed to want it. So I took it back with me to Penang when I finished my study. And in my room it stayed, untouched, for a few years. I would occasionally marvelled at how new and complete the game board and its bank notes were because it's obvious they've only been very gently played with (my cousins' board were almost torn in two and most of the notes were all curled up at the corners from the heavy play).
I started working in Singapore 10 years ago so my room in my grandparents' home has not been occupied since but the door was not locked just in case my visiting aunt needed a room to spend her nights. At this point my cousins and their parents already moved to a new home of their own and so did my parents and siblings. The occupants who were still there were my grandparents, my uncle TB and his son SP.
About 7 years ago, my grandparents' home went under renovation during mid-year. It was a spur of the moment decision by my grandfather after his visited one of his friend's refurbished house. It couldn't wait until I came back to pack my things up. They told me all my stuff would remain in the room while they renovated the place.
By the next Chinese New Year, when I had my spring break, I went back to my grandparent's house to re-organise my room and hopefully able to move some stuff to my parent's current home (which was small and didn't have a room for me but they did have a store room of sort). Guess what? I couldn't find the Monopoly.
I was extremely upset but what could I have done? It could've been the renovator, uncle TB (who has a habit of selling things at Penang's famous Thief's Market for some spare cash) or his son SP. So upset as I was, I told myself it didn't belong to me in the first place, so hopefully now it's gone to some caring hands. I tried to just let it go but the memory of it never really went away.
5 years ago, my parents moved again to another house. The house came with TWO storerooms so it was really great for me to store all my childhood stuff I didn't bring with me to Singapore. When I was going through my stuff, something which I've totally forgotten about after Primary School (1988) caught my eye and fond memories came flooding back:
Source: http://www.toydreams.co.uk/mask/maskboxed.html
There are tonnes of MASK literature online so I'm not going to repeat here. As you can see from the box, DYNAMO is an off road vehicle which will split into 2 – a chopper and an assault cart. It also comes with two action figures, neat. The other one I had was VANDAL, a bulldozer which splits into a plane and a jeep. Also with two action figures. This is a bad guy. I was very happy to have re-found them! BUT...
YES BUT! Just 3 months ago, I had a break in Penang and I was going to bring these two toys back to Singapore. GUESS WHAT? I COULD NOT FIND THEM! I've looked everywhere in both storerooms but I just don't know where they were hiding. Over the years my mum had shifted things around and added other stuff to those storerooms but she assured me she hasn't thrown anything out (when we were younger she threw away a working Polaroid camera citing expensive films, she threw away MANY things...) and I trusted her on this one because I've nagged at her (haha role reversal) over the years not to simply throw away my childhood memories and certain things become valuable with age. (07 Dec 2012 Update: Apparently there is a THIRD storeroom! Mum shifted my MASK toys and some other stuff there!!)
This frustrating incident, my sentimental feelings working overtime coupled with the sad memory of the missing Monopoly opened a flood gate on, you guessed it, eBay! And what a wonderful place it is! One can find anything, SIMPLY ANYTHING! As long as you have the money for it and know when to stop, it is one of the best places on the Internet.
My quest begun with getting back the one I used to have: DYNAMO. And it arrived yesterday! I LOVE parcels!
And I think the two Bruce Satos are very happy to be here!
This is for back-up just in case I really can't find the old one when I go back again to Penang this coming August. I'm gonna move everything out of those storerooms and open every boxes!
Anyways, DYNAMO came in a sealed box with the cardboard insert and the stickers are still not applied yet! It's like buying a new 80s toy! And I think it's been stored in a warehouse that's built underground because the colour on the box are still vividly clear and nice (ad agencies should build a warehouse like this to store their precious precious Pantone charts).
Oh I just noticed my previous entry was dated 17 June 2010, about the same time I started my eBay frenzy (sometimes I bid till 5am), which I had to put a stop to yesterday haha. So yes, more things from eBay to come!
Thursday, June 17, 2010
Caramel: Mock Food in An Eatery = Mockery
A couple ordered a Smoked Duck Sandwich and a Smoked Salmon Pasta. After they took a bite of their meal they came back to us while we were on full battle mode fighting the lunch crowd.
"Our sandwich and pasta are not vegetarian!"
No ma'am and sir, they are obviously not!! Do we look like a typical Chinese "zhai" restaurant selling mock duck, mock bacon, mock chicken and mock salmon? (Do they even make mock salmon??) The vegetarian menu was clearly printed on one page titled VEGETARIAN, which was given to them together with the non-veg menu and drink list.
Sheesh.
"Our sandwich and pasta are not vegetarian!"
No ma'am and sir, they are obviously not!! Do we look like a typical Chinese "zhai" restaurant selling mock duck, mock bacon, mock chicken and mock salmon? (Do they even make mock salmon??) The vegetarian menu was clearly printed on one page titled VEGETARIAN, which was given to them together with the non-veg menu and drink list.
Sheesh.
Tuesday, June 15, 2010
Caramel: "Are You Fried?"
A woman walked into the shop at 8.15pm.
Woman:"I want 2 chicken sandwiches and 1 chicken salad."
After placing her order, she started grilling our nice part-timer with all sorts of questions, including:
"Are the chicken fried or baked? I don't want my chicken fried."
("They are baked, ma'am.")
"What bread do you use?"
(English white bread, ma'am.")
"No wholemeal bread?"
("Sorry ma'am, no.")
"OK never mind. Are they toasted?"
("Yes ma'am.")
etc...
After hogging the nicer part-timer for 5 minutes...
Woman: "Is my order ready?"
Me: "We are preparing your order now, ma'am."
Woman: "Can you hurry up? My movie started at 8.15pm."
(Then stop bloody hogging the part-timer and let him help us with your order!)
She waited another 1 minute and she stepped into the kitchen while I was preparing her sandwiches!
Me: "Ma'am, please, this is our kitchen!"
Woman: "Ya, ya, ya..."
She looked at the chicken.
Woman: "Why is your chicken so dark? Is it fried? I said I don't want my chicken fried!"
Me: "No ma'am, the chicken is not fried. It's marinated with soy sauce then oven-baked!"
After the woman left (she almost just left us with all her orders done but I catch her just in time before she walked out of the door), I told the chef about her questioning how the chicken was cooked.
The chef, in his unusually bitchy mode, said:
"You should've asked her is she's fried, since she's so dark."
Woman:"I want 2 chicken sandwiches and 1 chicken salad."
After placing her order, she started grilling our nice part-timer with all sorts of questions, including:
"Are the chicken fried or baked? I don't want my chicken fried."
("They are baked, ma'am.")
"What bread do you use?"
(English white bread, ma'am.")
"No wholemeal bread?"
("Sorry ma'am, no.")
"OK never mind. Are they toasted?"
("Yes ma'am.")
etc...
After hogging the nicer part-timer for 5 minutes...
Woman: "Is my order ready?"
Me: "We are preparing your order now, ma'am."
Woman: "Can you hurry up? My movie started at 8.15pm."
(Then stop bloody hogging the part-timer and let him help us with your order!)
She waited another 1 minute and she stepped into the kitchen while I was preparing her sandwiches!
Me: "Ma'am, please, this is our kitchen!"
Woman: "Ya, ya, ya..."
She looked at the chicken.
Woman: "Why is your chicken so dark? Is it fried? I said I don't want my chicken fried!"
Me: "No ma'am, the chicken is not fried. It's marinated with soy sauce then oven-baked!"
After the woman left (she almost just left us with all her orders done but I catch her just in time before she walked out of the door), I told the chef about her questioning how the chicken was cooked.
The chef, in his unusually bitchy mode, said:
"You should've asked her is she's fried, since she's so dark."
Friday, June 4, 2010
Caramel: 搞乜鬼
Overheard in one of Shaw Tower's elevators, by three Cantonese-speaking uncles:
Uncle 1: "Really dunno what the heck is going on here."
Uncle 2: "Ya lor, Subway's gone, Mr Bean also gone!"
Uncle 3: "Really dunno what they heck are they doing!"
Our sentiments, precisely.
Uncle 1: "Really dunno what the heck is going on here."
Uncle 2: "Ya lor, Subway's gone, Mr Bean also gone!"
Uncle 3: "Really dunno what they heck are they doing!"
Our sentiments, precisely.
Sunday, May 30, 2010
I Challenge You to My Boliao-ness
About a year ago I read about one half of a couplet from a Hong Kong magazine:
叉烧叉叉叉烧烧
(Barbecuing the char siew by skewering it to a char siew fork)
The immediate thought of a corresponding phrase was:
烧卖烧烧烧卖卖
(Selling the siew mai while it's still hot)
But they failed as a couplet because the characters don't have the matching properties required of a couplet:
叉烧叉(noun)叉(verb)叉烧(noun)烧(verb)
烧卖(noun)烧烧(adjective)烧卖(noun)卖(verb)
And I've been thinking about a better phrase ever since (on and off, haha).
Yesterday morning, it came to me:
汽水汽汽汽水水
(Effervescing the soda water by carbonating it with soda water gas)
And the properties are:
叉烧叉(n)叉(v)叉烧(n)烧(v)
汽水汽(n)汽(v)汽水水(n)
NOOOOOOOOO!
Please help me with my boliao-ness. I don't want to be thinking about it for the rest of my life.
And while you are at it, you can read about 不肥佬。
叉烧叉叉叉烧烧
(Barbecuing the char siew by skewering it to a char siew fork)
The immediate thought of a corresponding phrase was:
烧卖烧烧烧卖卖
(Selling the siew mai while it's still hot)
But they failed as a couplet because the characters don't have the matching properties required of a couplet:
叉烧叉(noun)叉(verb)叉烧(noun)烧(verb)
烧卖(noun)烧烧(adjective)烧卖(noun)卖(verb)
And I've been thinking about a better phrase ever since (on and off, haha).
Yesterday morning, it came to me:
汽水汽汽汽水水
(Effervescing the soda water by carbonating it with soda water gas)
And the properties are:
叉烧叉(n)叉(v)叉烧(n)烧(v)
汽水汽(n)汽(v)汽水水(n)
NOOOOOOOOO!
Please help me with my boliao-ness. I don't want to be thinking about it for the rest of my life.
And while you are at it, you can read about 不肥佬。
Thursday, May 20, 2010
Costa Orang Tua
CK called it a floating old folks' home.
How apt.
Last Sunday we were invited to go on board this cruise ship called Costa Romantica for a look-see and free luncheon. It was organised by CK's high school friend who works in a travel agency. Nice lady and quite a chatty person.
We were first brought to look at the cabins. The cabins were fine - not too small or big, just nice for two person. Definitely should go for the Outside Cabin, meaning it has a porthole window. It makes a huge difference to the interior with light streaming in and a view of the sea.
Apart from the OK cabin, my dream of crusing around the world in a ship like Titanic sank faster than the Titanic.
The carpeted corridor were musty. And as you enter different deck or area, a different (unpleasant) smell hit you. Sometimes stale, sometimes acrid.
And there were lots of sagging skin as we visited the sun deck and pool. I understood from the hostess the ship just came from Australia, with 99% of retirees on board. We only soptted one teenage girl. That poor thing.
We had our lunch in one of the restaurants. Different from the buffet hall, the lunch here is served as a set, and is better than the buffet food, according to CK's friend. The appertizer was salted beef with cheese and salad, which was pleasant. What followed was a downhill parade of mediocre food (very salty penne, veal with identity crisis as it wanted to taste like pork and a watery mess of coffee cream pretending to be Tiramisu) which made me think, if we were on board for a week, we will have no choice but to eat these. SCARY.
On a more intoxicating note, the drinks are cheap (1-for-1 all day) and the cocktails exotic. I'm sure Lola will be happy here: wake up, stuff face with food, drink, drink, drink, more food, more drinks, sleep, wake up, repeat.
How apt.
Last Sunday we were invited to go on board this cruise ship called Costa Romantica for a look-see and free luncheon. It was organised by CK's high school friend who works in a travel agency. Nice lady and quite a chatty person.
We were first brought to look at the cabins. The cabins were fine - not too small or big, just nice for two person. Definitely should go for the Outside Cabin, meaning it has a porthole window. It makes a huge difference to the interior with light streaming in and a view of the sea.
Apart from the OK cabin, my dream of crusing around the world in a ship like Titanic sank faster than the Titanic.
The carpeted corridor were musty. And as you enter different deck or area, a different (unpleasant) smell hit you. Sometimes stale, sometimes acrid.
And there were lots of sagging skin as we visited the sun deck and pool. I understood from the hostess the ship just came from Australia, with 99% of retirees on board. We only soptted one teenage girl. That poor thing.
We had our lunch in one of the restaurants. Different from the buffet hall, the lunch here is served as a set, and is better than the buffet food, according to CK's friend. The appertizer was salted beef with cheese and salad, which was pleasant. What followed was a downhill parade of mediocre food (very salty penne, veal with identity crisis as it wanted to taste like pork and a watery mess of coffee cream pretending to be Tiramisu) which made me think, if we were on board for a week, we will have no choice but to eat these. SCARY.
On a more intoxicating note, the drinks are cheap (1-for-1 all day) and the cocktails exotic. I'm sure Lola will be happy here: wake up, stuff face with food, drink, drink, drink, more food, more drinks, sleep, wake up, repeat.
Caramel: Cirque du Fuck
So we were having this free drink promotion to attract customers. We handed out flyers and pasted multiple copies of posters on our glass panels to let people know that we are going to close our cafe for good if they don't come in this instant and get their freebies.
The next thing we know, came this email from the building management, which consists of 3 utterly useless, gutless fucks, asking us to remove our posters or reorganise them into a corner so that no one can see them for the sake of their building's image.
WHAT IMAGE? If the building wanted an image, it would first spit out these 3 pieces of crap, collapsed upon itself and asked to be redesigned and rebuilt.
A few rounds of emails ensued until we became so irritated we asked them to meet us face to face. The meeting was set on Tuesday. Tuesday came and the meeting time went but no fugly face in sight. Did I have a hunch? Yes I did.
I wanted to see how bad their incompetence can get. I checked my gmail (those retards' favourite mode of communication) to find out that they've actually sent an email to cancel the meeting because one of them has fallen ill.
"Yes let's send an email to cancel the meeting, they operate a cafe but I'm sure someone is specifically assigned to check emails every 5 seconds, even though we've sent the email at 10am to cancel the 4pm meeting and yet to receive their acknowledgement of the cancellation. Let's not bother. Let's not have the courtesy to inform them through phone or mobile. Let's have lunch now."
We used to call them The Three Musketeers but that's such an overrated compliment. They are a bunch of clowns.
The next thing we know, came this email from the building management, which consists of 3 utterly useless, gutless fucks, asking us to remove our posters or reorganise them into a corner so that no one can see them for the sake of their building's image.
WHAT IMAGE? If the building wanted an image, it would first spit out these 3 pieces of crap, collapsed upon itself and asked to be redesigned and rebuilt.
A few rounds of emails ensued until we became so irritated we asked them to meet us face to face. The meeting was set on Tuesday. Tuesday came and the meeting time went but no fugly face in sight. Did I have a hunch? Yes I did.
I wanted to see how bad their incompetence can get. I checked my gmail (those retards' favourite mode of communication) to find out that they've actually sent an email to cancel the meeting because one of them has fallen ill.
"Yes let's send an email to cancel the meeting, they operate a cafe but I'm sure someone is specifically assigned to check emails every 5 seconds, even though we've sent the email at 10am to cancel the 4pm meeting and yet to receive their acknowledgement of the cancellation. Let's not bother. Let's not have the courtesy to inform them through phone or mobile. Let's have lunch now."
We used to call them The Three Musketeers but that's such an overrated compliment. They are a bunch of clowns.
Wednesday, May 19, 2010
Caramel: A Place Where Birds Don't Lay Eggs
It's a Chinese saying which means a place so remote even birds don't fly there. And that's where we're at. Exit bridal shop, exit steamboat restaurant, exit soya drink stall, exit watch shop, even ATM doesn't want to be here. They've always stressed that their centre lacked the "critical mass", which we already knew, as it was printed in black and white on the offer letter (for the place) before we moved in. But what baffles me is, they actually "highlight" this lesser fact, again and again, through their email correspondence with us.
Now, instead of saying there's no crowd coming to their centre, why don't they do something about it? I do not know. Oh yeah they did - they created a Facebook page which no one knows about and a website which no one visits. It just seems that they are more comfortable admitting defeat than trying to promote their centre (yes EFFORT AND MONEY will be spent instead of perfunctorily organizing a very sorry ass of a flea market which looked like a primary school charity sales event, and attracted no one).
But one thing for sure, they are very good at getting replacements (read: dumbassese like us who were lured by the delusions of cheap-but-not-exactly-that-cheap rent and non-existent office crowd from above their centre). Not the ATM, though. Banks are smarter - they don't go to a place where birds don't lay eggs.
Now, instead of saying there's no crowd coming to their centre, why don't they do something about it? I do not know. Oh yeah they did - they created a Facebook page which no one knows about and a website which no one visits. It just seems that they are more comfortable admitting defeat than trying to promote their centre (yes EFFORT AND MONEY will be spent instead of perfunctorily organizing a very sorry ass of a flea market which looked like a primary school charity sales event, and attracted no one).
But one thing for sure, they are very good at getting replacements (read: dumbassese like us who were lured by the delusions of cheap-but-not-exactly-that-cheap rent and non-existent office crowd from above their centre). Not the ATM, though. Banks are smarter - they don't go to a place where birds don't lay eggs.
Friday, May 14, 2010
Childhood Fishbone-in-Throat Remedies
PLEASE DO NOT TRY THESE AT HOME. Or anyhwere else. Just don't eat fish.
Tuesday, May 11, 2010
Random: Do You Have FB?
No, I do not have Facebook. As marvellous a networking tool as it seems, I do not want to be caught in its web of mind-disorienting navigation and losing hours in frustration trying to figure out what the heck has happened to the pix and comment I just posted and WTF is going on with all those groups and members and fans and fuck nots.. based on my experience using my friend's account. I'd rather have a fuck buddy than Facebook, at least I get pleasure from the former.
Saturday, May 1, 2010
Is That Your Ass on Your Face?
Appley went out with her bf last night and bumped into her assface client.
Assface: "Hi Appley, is he your son?"
What an idiot! First of all, Appley's bf is only two or three years younger than her, not two decades. Secondly, how can you mistaken someone who is two years younger as someone else's son? Younger brother, maybe. But son?! It's not like humans have lifespan of a fruit fly.
Assface should go for reconstructive surgery to remove ass from face; Appley should shave her beard to make herself look younger.
Caramel: How About I Tiao Ta'ng in Front of You?
First thing first: I'm not a Christian, Buddhist, Taoist or Muslim. I'm a Non-committed Polytheist: meaning I pray to gods (not any one in particular) when I'm in dire straits (like when I want a limited edition Birkin so badly I hope it'd just drop from the sky) and I pretty much leave them alone most of the time.
The thing that perplexes me is, ever since I set up the shop, I've witnessed MANY Christians coming into the shop, sat down, ordered food, ate and then started doing this gather round the circle thingee and praising the lord thingee, sometimes they'd put hands on another member's head or shoulder like they are channelling some cosmic energy from one to another.
OK to be fair, they don't do it loudly but audible enough for other patrons to notice what they are doing and sometimes it does get a bit OTT with all the hand gestures to express their passion. At times they'd also raise from their seats, heads lowered, like they're discussing their next volleyball tactics. It's all very distracting when I'm trying to finesse my bacon sandwich with swirls of truffle oil and dainty sprinkling of salt and pepper.
I'm not against Bible study. But other than that shouldn't you be doing your emotional hail out loud in a church or a fellow member's home where there's more privacy? Because seriously so far I haven't encountered a Buddhist chanting Buddha's teachings in the shop or a Taoist suddenly go tiao ta'ng for divine advice.
Not to be done in public.
The thing that perplexes me is, ever since I set up the shop, I've witnessed MANY Christians coming into the shop, sat down, ordered food, ate and then started doing this gather round the circle thingee and praising the lord thingee, sometimes they'd put hands on another member's head or shoulder like they are channelling some cosmic energy from one to another.
OK to be fair, they don't do it loudly but audible enough for other patrons to notice what they are doing and sometimes it does get a bit OTT with all the hand gestures to express their passion. At times they'd also raise from their seats, heads lowered, like they're discussing their next volleyball tactics. It's all very distracting when I'm trying to finesse my bacon sandwich with swirls of truffle oil and dainty sprinkling of salt and pepper.
I'm not against Bible study. But other than that shouldn't you be doing your emotional hail out loud in a church or a fellow member's home where there's more privacy? Because seriously so far I haven't encountered a Buddhist chanting Buddha's teachings in the shop or a Taoist suddenly go tiao ta'ng for divine advice.
Not to be done in public.
Friday, April 30, 2010
I Peed Peas
Me and Appley went to Fou de Fafa for lunch yesterday and we both agreed it was the most miserable lunch we've had in a long while.
Appley ordered the brown rice salad and it turned out to feel like she was eating rice seasoned with curry powder from Maggie instant noodles. I had the couscous salad with some fancy Mediterranean Vacation name which was an equal disappointment. It came with a thin layer of veg on top, and 3 years' supply of chick peas underneath, sprinkled with a measly amount of couscous.
It was the looooongest lunch I ever had. And I couldn't finish my peas! The only saving grace was the banana yoghurt drink I ordered but then again I think anything taste good with banana.
We'll give the oil-soaked smelling place another try, but not anytime soon.
Green and thin.
Attack of the peas.
Chickpea overload.
Getting tired, even by just looking at it.
Appley ordered the brown rice salad and it turned out to feel like she was eating rice seasoned with curry powder from Maggie instant noodles. I had the couscous salad with some fancy Mediterranean Vacation name which was an equal disappointment. It came with a thin layer of veg on top, and 3 years' supply of chick peas underneath, sprinkled with a measly amount of couscous.
It was the looooongest lunch I ever had. And I couldn't finish my peas! The only saving grace was the banana yoghurt drink I ordered but then again I think anything taste good with banana.
We'll give the oil-soaked smelling place another try, but not anytime soon.
Green and thin.
Attack of the peas.
Chickpea overload.
Getting tired, even by just looking at it.
Caramel in Penang?
Last night I dreamt of setting up Caramel at my grandfather's shop house in Penang. Very vivid with details of where I'd have planters and how the partition glass doors would open up the living room to passersby. And how we can still live upstairs. CK would now have a full and complete kitchen. I've also thought of how to separate the kitchen from the toilet for public use.
Then I dreamt of how my obnoxious cousin came to reclaim her share of the shop house and we had to go to court over this.
I woke up at six and couldn't get back to sleep.
I think I'll ask my grandpa to give me a 100-year lease on that shop house.
If Singapore can do it, I can do it.
Then I dreamt of how my obnoxious cousin came to reclaim her share of the shop house and we had to go to court over this.
I woke up at six and couldn't get back to sleep.
I think I'll ask my grandpa to give me a 100-year lease on that shop house.
If Singapore can do it, I can do it.
Thursday, April 29, 2010
Penang: Wanna Come Cannot Come
Penangites are quite blunt. I went for a body massage the other day and there was another customer who was having a foot massage when I checked in. The male foot masseur asked the customer if he wanted a body massage after the foot massage. The customer replied, in Hokkien: "No lah, better not. Pressed (massaged) already at night cannot sleep because wanna out (cum) cannot out."
He was talking about when having a body massage, certain sensitive body parts will inevitably be aroused but there won't be any release because the massage parlour is a proper joint without the "happy ending".
That I assumed... maybe other people don't get aroused like that, maybe I'm just super excited about being kneaded. Anyways after my oil massage I was given a thorough rub with very very hot towels to remove the oil, followed by very generous amount of talcum powder all over to make me dry. Lola said this process seemed uncannily like tenderizing a piece of meat and flouring it before cooking.
He was talking about when having a body massage, certain sensitive body parts will inevitably be aroused but there won't be any release because the massage parlour is a proper joint without the "happy ending".
That I assumed... maybe other people don't get aroused like that, maybe I'm just super excited about being kneaded. Anyways after my oil massage I was given a thorough rub with very very hot towels to remove the oil, followed by very generous amount of talcum powder all over to make me dry. Lola said this process seemed uncannily like tenderizing a piece of meat and flouring it before cooking.
Tuesday, April 27, 2010
Shih Chung Branch School: "I Don’t Wanna Friend You Anymore!"
The class was devided into three clans: Lee Kok Hoe Clan, Chan Lay Peng Clan and Ah Eng Clan. Most girls were under the Chan Clan. Some boys were under the Lee Clan, some under Eng Clan and some were clanless.On some days the clan system has no function at all in our daily activities but most of the time it served one purpose: to hit someone from a different clan with ruler as soon as any part of his/her body crossed the invisible boundaries created by the table's edges. This happened when Lee Kok Hoe was not friend with Chan Lay Peng or Ah Eng was not friend with Lee Kok Hoe and so on...
It started with one ruler, but of course it's never enough. So it went on to become two, three, four rulers stacked together to give a fatal blow to the unsuspecting elbows or pinkies. I think the record was 10 rulers bound together by rubber band. And they were of different materials such as wood, steel and plastic. Plastic has good bounce but would sometimes crack; steel would accidentally cut so wood was the best assault device of choice.
Saturday, April 24, 2010
Things: Don’t Forget to Bring Along Your Sensibility And Cardigan When Flying Budget Airline
Apart from farter anonymous, marathonian crying babies and elbow crushing F&B carts, having someone else's loose-fitting sleeves constantly invading what's left of your personal space in a budget flight would definitely be on the top of the most annoyed experience list of the cheapskate (but anal) flyer.
Thank goodness for the cardigan!
Thursday, April 15, 2010
Monday, April 12, 2010
Shih Chung Branch School: Knock Knock
Loh Eng Keat was one of my BFFs but the thing I remember about him was his house. It's one of those typical two storey shop house where there's a five-foot-way (walk-way) in front of the entrance. Directly above the five-foot-way would be one of the bedrooms on the 2nd storey.
As the floor on the 2nd floor was made of wood, they drilled a tiny peephole on the floor and covered it with PVC mat. They can pretend nobody's home if loan sharks came knocking (example only, it's not like Eng Keat gambled all his school pocket money at Genting during Primary Three and had to outsource his finances) or pesky classmates kept bugging them.
As the floor on the 2nd floor was made of wood, they drilled a tiny peephole on the floor and covered it with PVC mat. They can pretend nobody's home if loan sharks came knocking (example only, it's not like Eng Keat gambled all his school pocket money at Genting during Primary Three and had to outsource his finances) or pesky classmates kept bugging them.
Saturday, April 10, 2010
Shih Chung Branch School: 小小商店
There was a section at the back of the classroom we called 小小商店 or "Little Store". It's mainly set up to get little kids interested in maths, business and commodity trading in years to come. The store is actually made up of six desks, where we'd place empty boxes, cans and bottles of daily items such as toothpaste, Milo, beer, cigarettes, etc.
The teacher would set the cost and price for each item and two or three students would be appointed shopkeepers and the rest are customers. We'd buy the items and the shopkeepers would record the sales and calculate the net profit when the shop was closed.
We abandoned this concept very soon. Firstly, no physical money was involved – imagine playing Monopoly without the fake notes. And we had to return the merchandise (even though they were just empty containers) at the end of each role-playing session, boo!
Me, on the other hand, was the 小小商人, or Budding Entrepreneur. I used to have lots of children's comic books, mainly 儿童乐园. I remember bringing stacks of them to school in my bag and during recess I'd rent them out at 10 cents per read (strictly no sharing). I even made library cards for overnight loans (20 cents each). But I couldn't keep up with demand and soon ran out of comics to rent. It was good business while it lasted.
This is not the actual comic I had but from the same series. This was published in 1954, way before I was born. I think my mum threw away all my 儿童乐园 *sobs*.
Source: swift
The teacher would set the cost and price for each item and two or three students would be appointed shopkeepers and the rest are customers. We'd buy the items and the shopkeepers would record the sales and calculate the net profit when the shop was closed.
We abandoned this concept very soon. Firstly, no physical money was involved – imagine playing Monopoly without the fake notes. And we had to return the merchandise (even though they were just empty containers) at the end of each role-playing session, boo!
Me, on the other hand, was the 小小商人, or Budding Entrepreneur. I used to have lots of children's comic books, mainly 儿童乐园. I remember bringing stacks of them to school in my bag and during recess I'd rent them out at 10 cents per read (strictly no sharing). I even made library cards for overnight loans (20 cents each). But I couldn't keep up with demand and soon ran out of comics to rent. It was good business while it lasted.
This is not the actual comic I had but from the same series. This was published in 1954, way before I was born. I think my mum threw away all my 儿童乐园 *sobs*.Source: swift
Friday, April 9, 2010
Shih Chung Branch School: The Canteen
Ah the canteen, a place we most looked forward to between classes. The canteen was split into two sections, on the right it has all sorts of savouries and on the left, snacks. The savoury food was fully subsidised by the government so each student was entitled to a free portion of whatever that was prepared by the canteen auntie that day.
Of the snacks, aside from the wildly popular Mamee and Ding Dang, my favourite was dried olives which came in a pack of three. The savoury food I liked most was the mee rebus with tomato gravy. The canteen auntie didn't cook it very often so whenever it's available I'd have it twice (we had two recesses).
The canteen was also the place I had my worst meals: I've had curled-up millipede on my fried bee hoon (most likely fallen from the beam) and get this – half way through my bee hoon (at another occasion), I pulled out a cockroach leg from my mouth!
Of the snacks, aside from the wildly popular Mamee and Ding Dang, my favourite was dried olives which came in a pack of three. The savoury food I liked most was the mee rebus with tomato gravy. The canteen auntie didn't cook it very often so whenever it's available I'd have it twice (we had two recesses).
The canteen was also the place I had my worst meals: I've had curled-up millipede on my fried bee hoon (most likely fallen from the beam) and get this – half way through my bee hoon (at another occasion), I pulled out a cockroach leg from my mouth!
Shih Chung Branch School: I’m Also A Princess
So I was a boy scout during Primary Four to Six. The Scout Master was Mr Yao, also the Disciplinary Head of the school. All those secret handshakes, knot-tying and commands are long forgotten but one incident:
There was a two-day Scouts' Camp we participated, held at a camp site which looked more like a jungle. I think all the boy scouts in Penang were there as I'd never seen so many scouts before. So it started pretty well with all sorts of activities, marching and games. Before long, we found out we had to take showers with a whole bunch of other kids in this open shower where you could see each other's XXX. I began to worry even though I haven't heard of the prisoner-and-soap-bar-on-the-shower-floor joke, but because I was generally quite shy.
During lunch, each of us was given a box of rice containing dishes cooked on site. When I got mine, as hungry as I was, I totally lost my appetite: within the box was some meat, veg, and a cooked giant centipede, with the rice dyed BLUE by the exotic dish. It must have gone into the pot or pan during preparation. I was given another box but the thought of contaminated dishes really wasn't appetizing.
Towards the evening, hunger and dreadfulness grew as it got closer to mass showing of XXX in the shower. And right on cue, I developed a fever. Not wanting to risk my condition worsening overnight, Mr Yao checked my body temperature and personally sent me home.
And guess what? As soon as I got home, my fever was gone! Maybe I was given a Panadol before that but I can't remember. I remembered having a nice dinner, a warm shower by myself and I slept like a princess.
There was a two-day Scouts' Camp we participated, held at a camp site which looked more like a jungle. I think all the boy scouts in Penang were there as I'd never seen so many scouts before. So it started pretty well with all sorts of activities, marching and games. Before long, we found out we had to take showers with a whole bunch of other kids in this open shower where you could see each other's XXX. I began to worry even though I haven't heard of the prisoner-and-soap-bar-on-the-shower-floor joke, but because I was generally quite shy.
During lunch, each of us was given a box of rice containing dishes cooked on site. When I got mine, as hungry as I was, I totally lost my appetite: within the box was some meat, veg, and a cooked giant centipede, with the rice dyed BLUE by the exotic dish. It must have gone into the pot or pan during preparation. I was given another box but the thought of contaminated dishes really wasn't appetizing.
Towards the evening, hunger and dreadfulness grew as it got closer to mass showing of XXX in the shower. And right on cue, I developed a fever. Not wanting to risk my condition worsening overnight, Mr Yao checked my body temperature and personally sent me home.
And guess what? As soon as I got home, my fever was gone! Maybe I was given a Panadol before that but I can't remember. I remembered having a nice dinner, a warm shower by myself and I slept like a princess.
Thursday, April 8, 2010
Shih Chung Branch School: April 2008
You'd notice the height of the 1st storey is only half of that of the 2nd storey. You are right: half of the 1st storey is actually underground. I don't know why it's built that way but it's definitely built as a basement because there's a grand staircase at the facade which leads you straight to the 2nd storey.
Maybe it's for some fengshui reasons or more likely, geographic reasons: the building (originally a house) is quite near the sea so if there's ever a flood water would go into the basement instead of the living quarters on the 2nd storey.
Photo by ~horeb on deviantART
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